When I Was Pregnant
When I was pregnant...No one said congratulations. I was married and employed and everyone was just mortified even though some of them barely knew me. When I was pregnant no one took any photos of me. No one measured my stomach against a wall for a fun chart. No one took me out for a day of pampering. When I was pregnant I actually lost friends and jobs and family support.
When I gave birth...When I gave birth a few relatives stepped up and sent gifts and said congrats and came to meet my son...if I drove somewhere close to them. When I gave birth the few local friends had all gave me some sort of gift and then basically, they all vanished. I did not keep one friend passed the time my son turned about 6-7 months old.
When my son got all of his diagnoses...Everyone I know shared pity. Said their 'I'm sorries' and snickered behind my back as various other people kept me informed of the snickering, even though I kept asking them to stop telling me. Family all said they were so concerned and cared so much but NONE of them reached out to me. They would contact one or both of my parents to say these kind words. No cards. No calls. No visits. Nothing that actually took effort. I would drive hundreds of miles to see "friends" and relatives and to let everyone meet my beautiful child and they all gushed and hugged and kissed and then we went home, and they never reached out. No cards, calls, or visits...Just the same old bs of contacting my parents to send second hand give a damns.
My mom passed 7 years ago. Now relatives from my mom's side who never had any connection to my dad...they send their 2nd hand give a damns to him. They all say it's because I move so much they never know how to reach me. I have had the same email address for several years. I have had the same website with a contact page on it for 5 years...They just have excuses because my son and I are not worth their time.
I have stopped the traveling to see relatives. I have stopped sending cards and occasional gifts. I have stopped it all. I don't even have energy for the give a dams...Because I don't. I have tried so hard for so long. My son deserves better people in his life than these people. I believe I do too, but he is my only concern. We have a few friends who I am hoping are truly the family I feel they have become to me. We have a dog and some cats. We are slowly but surly building ourselves a family.
If you're stuck with people who do not think you are worth a crap on your best or worst day, do not waste your energy! Just keep on keeping on.
When I gave birth...When I gave birth a few relatives stepped up and sent gifts and said congrats and came to meet my son...if I drove somewhere close to them. When I gave birth the few local friends had all gave me some sort of gift and then basically, they all vanished. I did not keep one friend passed the time my son turned about 6-7 months old.
When my son got all of his diagnoses...Everyone I know shared pity. Said their 'I'm sorries' and snickered behind my back as various other people kept me informed of the snickering, even though I kept asking them to stop telling me. Family all said they were so concerned and cared so much but NONE of them reached out to me. They would contact one or both of my parents to say these kind words. No cards. No calls. No visits. Nothing that actually took effort. I would drive hundreds of miles to see "friends" and relatives and to let everyone meet my beautiful child and they all gushed and hugged and kissed and then we went home, and they never reached out. No cards, calls, or visits...Just the same old bs of contacting my parents to send second hand give a damns.
My mom passed 7 years ago. Now relatives from my mom's side who never had any connection to my dad...they send their 2nd hand give a damns to him. They all say it's because I move so much they never know how to reach me. I have had the same email address for several years. I have had the same website with a contact page on it for 5 years...They just have excuses because my son and I are not worth their time.
I have stopped the traveling to see relatives. I have stopped sending cards and occasional gifts. I have stopped it all. I don't even have energy for the give a dams...Because I don't. I have tried so hard for so long. My son deserves better people in his life than these people. I believe I do too, but he is my only concern. We have a few friends who I am hoping are truly the family I feel they have become to me. We have a dog and some cats. We are slowly but surly building ourselves a family.
If you're stuck with people who do not think you are worth a crap on your best or worst day, do not waste your energy! Just keep on keeping on.
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